"AAAAAAAAAYAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!", the scream echoed, bouncing off the walls. Wait, not all that echo is from the walls, that's the echo effect. But I'm not screaming. Then what the hell...

Oh. Of course. It's Billy.

I got up and looked outside- blackness. I'm sure I've been sleeping for a few hours- I didn't think Billy would do something so silly as intentionally piss me off by waiting and then screaming. I walked into his room about the same time Sarah did, and he just sat there, simply looking at us. Sarah looked back at him with a murderous scowl.

"Uhh.. what time is it?", he asked, apparently embarrassed.

"Oh-dark-thirty.", Sarah replied with anger. Apparently Sarah dislikes losing sleep. Considering her previous line of work, where sleep is a treasured resource, I can't say I blame her.

"Billy, never do that again.", I commanded him. Usually I get specific with the commands, but he knew exactly what I meant.

"Do the rules for these things go something like 'if I can't control it, then neither can the implants'?"

"Yes.", I answered. What he was saying began to register.

"Then that's not going to help.", he replied, and I could tell from his voice that he genuinely wished that command would work on him. I muttered some Latin profanity, rolling my eyes. Damn. I know a few servants have uncommandable impulses, but Billy?! Psychologically it doesn't mean much, though. This could be a one-time involuntary scream out of fear, which would make sense given the circumstances and the likely potency of his nightmare. When he said he was going to have fucked-up dreams tonight, he wasn't kidding. Sarah chuckled with her usual morbid humor.

"They all scream.", she said. "I screamed a bit at the start, you scream at night without thinking about it. Almost everyone in pain screams sooner or later. The only exceptions are those who don't live long enough to get the chance."

"Well, if he only screams at night, there are other solutions than commands..", I pointed out. I could gag him or physically silence him in other ways, none of which I really want to do.

"What the hell should I say? I didn't mean to, and I didn't like doing that." And since he cannot lie to me, I'll simply overlook this as a small price to pay for having him. He flopped back down on the bed with a thump, closed his eyes, and appeared to return directly to dreamland. Sarah looked first at him and then at me. I just shook my head and motioned for us to return to bed. She shrugged and we did just that.

Sarah woke me up that morning. Usually, of course, I sleep in, but this is a different situation entirely. I put the suit on, took the elevator all the way down, grabbed something I figured Billy would find useful, and went to see if he was up. He was still zonked. I told him to get up and he popped up with a start, surprised.

"Get dressed and make them work.", I commanded him. "I don't care what you do to them so long as every one of them can still work. If you ever intend to scare them, do it with this." I laid the large, giant-barreled weapon down on his bed.

As he was getting dressed, he looked at the device and recoiled somewhat. "What do you kill with that?!"

I only grinned at him. "Jets.. tanks.. battleships.. it's an atomic shotgun." The Atomic Shotgun was developed a bit before the Micro. It uses a small amount of fission power to propel a rather large projectile at many times the speed of sound. It puts holes in literally anything, going through a dozen yards of our strongest metals- which laugh at the highest caliber of normal bullets and are only slightly dented by normal armor-piercing bullets- before slowing to a stop. It's heavy and large, but we're engineered and we can deal with that.

The only thing I don't like about it is its incredible loudness, but that makes it useful for scaring peasants.

"Ehh?! You managed to..?!", Billy asked, amazed.

"That's right. We managed to micronize fission explosives as well. It's a good thing they can't get out of control."

He was finally finished dressing, and he made a "Kaboom!" sound and gesture. I nodded at him and he walked past me and down the stairs to fulfill my command. I considered watching him, but he's going to have to learn to deal with this shit on his own and so I went to the screen to fulfill the intelligence requirement.

Ugh. There is no way I'd bother to describe the problems here. Just grinding, difficult logic, mathematical (the calculator-won't-help kind), and spatial problems that would make genius-level normals grit their teeth in frustration. I'm glad I learned how to solve the logic problems with the grid system a couple of years ago. Although Illuminated knowledge was required for many of them, there were no Illuminated people-manipulation problems; they can only give me ones with definite answers. Twenty tough but fairly small problems, enough to make a normal's brain bleed. It's a good thing I'm not doing this test alone. I'd love to have Billy help me with these but I doubt his mind is quite at the level of mine. He'll catch up, certainly, but that's probably going to have to wait until this bullshit is over.

I heard an earth-shattering BOOM on problem number 3. That was Billy, experiencing the full force of that weapon's loudness. It's a good thing we regenerate, otherwise that thing would lead to permanently damaged eardrums. I doubt any of those peasants had heard anything like that before.

Billy walked back in on problem number 4, a slight smile of success on his face. I chuckled. "Not bad. That'll work- for maybe a few hours. You will have to manage them in the long run. But fear should keep them going for a while." Fear is going to be the primary source of work from them. Keeping them scared will keep them going. I usually don't like fear from those who work for me- it lessens efficiency- but this is an entirely different group of people acting on entirely different rules.

"So what's that?", he asked, motioning to the screen.

"Oh, just an ordinary IQ test..", I said, shrugging. "Ordinary for us, anyway. I'm just not allowed to make any mistakes."

"How many questions?"

"Twenty quick ones." Quick for me, at least.

"Are you going to want help?" Well, of course I WANT it, but..

"Not from you. Not yet, anyway. A lot of these questions talk about things you know nothing about." His face marked a total lack of surprise.

"So you have to get all the answers exactly right? What if you just ordinarily screw up? They're going to get rid of you just for one fucking question wrong?" Watching Billy understand the Illuminati is an invigorating thing.

I looked at him, and nodded with a grimace. "Billy, you've never seen this kind of thing before. Almost nowhere in the normal world is there truly zero tolerance for errors. Remember, this is probably one of the few times they're ever going to be able to make demands of me, and so they want to make sure of one thing- that I don't screw up. Which I generally don't. Of course, that doesn't make it much easier..."

He shrugged. "You're going to get them all right and all done on time." His voice showed nothing but complete confidence.

"How do you know?"

"Because I didn't get sent here just to watch you get tossed into a cage on the first day." I slowly made my way to a full laugh. That would be ironic, wouldn't it?

"That's anti-logic which makes sense. I've heard a lot of that. But no, improbability does not closely correspond with truth in this organization." Where truth can be found, that is. I felt a twinge of hunger and decided to satiate it. "Make me some pancakes." Wait.. "Oh, crap. Cancel that. Shit." I had devoted too many brain cells to the logic problems at hand.

"Potatoes in the morning, potatoes in the evening, potatoes at suppertime..", Billy sung with just a touch of mockery.

"Billy, there are fruit-bearing trees on this island. Go to the kitchen, take one of the larger bowls, and get it back here filled with fruit." He silently went to do it, and I returned my attention to the problems.

This is annoying. Is it really necessary for me to know how many moves it takes to do a shifting-block puzzle in? Must I know how long an Enforcer can keep walking assuming a certain rate of physical decay? They even made me take off the exact time it takes for an Enforcer to piss! Groan.

I slogged through the problems at a fairly rapid pace, considering them more like torture than a test. Damn it, if you want to fucking test me, put me in the damn position for a month and then try to get me out. I'd love to see that. Then again, except for annoying me with this endurance bullshit, they apparently don't want to get into my physical abilities at all. Or maybe they will. This is only the first test, after all.

My thoughts turned to failure and I decided to take a minute to consider it. What the hell would they do if I did? Who the hell else do they have available? Daddy talked to me about tests before but he spoke as if they were all in the past. Apparently he wasn't allowed to warn me. And if I fail, they either have a contingency plan, which is an unpleasant thought- or they don't have a contingency plan, which is an even more unpleasant thought. They better. Illuminati have a tendency to find a contingency plan where there isn't one, but when it comes to Dominator succession, that quickly turns into the chaos of civil war. Failure minute up. Time to focus on success. Although I developed a small headache, I got to problem twenty much more quickly than I had expected (which probably meant they'll make it harder in coming days, oh joy), and I had Sarah come down to check my answers, which she did with her practiced professionalism.

Billy arrived as she finished doing it. I clicked the button to send the answers in and sighed. "I get the feeling that they're going to make it easy for me the first time and then get serious in a couple of days."

"Didn't you just say earlier that it was hard?" I smiled at him. Now he understands. "Ah. I get it." He pushed the bowl forward and I took it and started eating grapes. But I can't relax yet. Groan. It's a good thing only the top levels of the Illuminati developed this test. If it was made by fifth levels, I could afford to kill them for the sheer annoyance of this.

"I suppose they want me to do that silly physical shit now..", I said.

"It's only four weeks of it, Howard.", Billy said, some mild taunting in his voice.

"Taunt me all you want. Just make sure those peasants fucking work. I'll be back in eighteen minutes or I'll not be back at all.", I replied, getting up and putting the bowl on the end table. Billy and Sarah walked out to deal with the peasants while I went to the start of the run, annoyed at the people who will surely take this run through places that don't approximate flat land at all.

I just started running when I got to the white line; I knew that an Enforcer would start timing me the moment I crossed it. This isn't hard, just annoying, and I was dodging tree limbs and vaulting up rocks within the first quarter kilometer. I turned my body on autopilot and let my mind roam.

So now it begins. Ten years of training, education, and entertainment turn into five weeks of testing and an eternity of Domination, ass kicking (my servants already killed somebody, so I know I'll have a lot of that cut out for me), and entertainment. The power is a curse as well as a blessing. I won't control the world, I reminded myself- I'll just control the people who control the world. It saves me an enormous logistical hassle, but gives me lots of personal hassles. Fortunately, I have fear on my side (where would the Illuminati be without it?), as well as personal abilities and servants. Which leads me to a simple question..

What the hell is with them for creating and implanting Billy? Not that I don't appreciate having him, but...

It was the first time I've metaphorically sat down and asked myself this question rationally. What the hell? I find it difficult to believe that it was decided upon. They've had trouble dealing with Dominators in the past, I'm engineered so I'll be far, far worse- and yet they create him? They must know I'll use him as a second, so.. why?

My thoughts turned to present reality so I could jump on a few well-placed rocks in the river right in front of the waterfall, which I did without breaking a stride. The mist was somewhat refreshing but I couldn't afford to stop and take a drink. I continued past a few fruit trees, scared away a snorting pig, and regained my train of thought.

I've always tried to retain a sense of detachment from both myself and the Levels. It lets me laugh at myself and them from time to time, and it reminds me that grandeur is foolish unless practiced by the truly grand. Most important of all, it helps me fulfill the Illuminated requirement for making objective decisions, and it's why I can say that objectively it doesn't make a damn bit of sense. Maybe Daddy thought it would be for the best. Maybe it was considered necessary for a reason I can't fathom (this happens all too frequently- Illuminati doing things that other Illuminati can't fathom. It creates massive, massive headaches for Dominators.). I don't think asking would give me the answer I'm looking for, and decision-making details are seldom published in the database.

And, of course, this is just the beginning of the insanity. What else they'll do is anyone's guess.

The run took me over parts of the rocky, gravelly mountain, through the forest (where my dogs happily chased me for a few minutes before returning to their natural home), and finally past the peasants, which were watched by Enforcers only. Sarah had probably decided to let them actually do the work of watching them, which was a good choice. I crossed the starting line to finish the run, then immediately went back inside. I could have done the run again right afterwards, but my legs hurt. My regeneration would heal the ache in a few minutes, of course. Did I mention how much I love being engineered?

And my (and therefore his own) engineering is exactly what Billy was looking up as I opened the door, to my complete lack of surprise. "I was wondering when your curiosity would get the better of you." My presence startled him and he closed the computer window in reflex before turning around to look at me.

"Are you kidding? As soon as Sarah told me about this, I had to start looking." His initial panic and frantic question-asking had turned into an actual search for real answers, answers I need him to know anyway.

"Good. Sarah and the Enforcers can deal with the peasants, you'll have lots of extra time." As I said that, I realized that this test really would be easy and that the Illuminati who made it up really weren't considering that I'd have help. "I'm not going to be silly and try to command you to learn," It's a real shame I can't. It wouldn't work. He'd end up trying to digest too much information at one time and forget too much of it. "but just remember that you're going to eventually have to know everything I know.. I'll help you with the Latin later." He reacted at that last part. Latin is considered difficult by normals, naturally, but it shouldn't be that hard for Billy, even though he is past the formative years of language learning. He went back to studying; a bit later I did the run again. The fruit was not going to satiate all three of us all day, and Sarah later fetched the potatoes.

"Hungry? Need I ask?"

"It would be just like them to make the things really bitter...", I observed, simply taking one and biting into it- I couldn't afford the nutrient loss cooking would cause. Ack. "Not bitter. Tasteless and a bit salty." The salt was probably from all the times tall ocean waves hit that particular field, although the frequent rain washes most of that sort of thing away. I thought of running in the rain, and being watched closely, and then got an idea that I should have had earlier. "Sarah, are we being watched?"

"Definitely. Not when we're in here, though. Just outside to make sure you're running."

"Can they tell us apart?"

"The implants transmit, Howard." Gack. Ugh. That means anyone can tell us apart- and anyone can locate Sarah. I'll have to turn that shit off when this test is over. "If you want, I'll gladly spy on the spies and see what they're using."

"Get ready and do it." She walked up the stairs to get the proper equipment. "So, Billy- what have you found out so far today?"

"A little bit of everything and a lot of mind control." No surprises here.

I nodded. "Good. For the rest of this test, when you don't have more pressing matters to attend to and it's not going to get anything of mine damaged or destroyed, you should listen to your curiosity." I can't command him to learn. I can command him to follow his natural impulses to find things out. He immediately stood up and started walking upstairs. "Where are you going?"

"To follow Sarah. I want to know how you spy on Illuminati spies." Ah. I nodded some more and smiled. Good. Although he'd gleefully rip me a new one if given the chance, one of the things we agree on is that he needs to know just what the hell the Illuminati really is and does.

Well, of course he does, I reminded myself. He's just been thrust into a new world, one several steps above his daily feast of lies and manufactured bullshit. Having absolute truth at his fingertips must have been a rush. Three decades ago, my predecessor was limited predominantly to a telephone and, later, a highly primitive terminal. Today I could drown myself in information if I wanted to; the terabit connection I have to the world's reality is many times faster than I can think. Naturally, I don't care about the details. Even when I don't have anything to do, trying to amass too much information in my limited-size brain cuts in on my fun-having time. And the only information Billy cares about right now is the information that can tell him roughly what the hell is going on here. (He'll never know exactly what the hell is going on here. Even I can't know that.)

Billy and Sarah walked out, Sarah wearing a foliage-colored ghillie suit that made her look like a panther on two legs. Oh, she's going to be sniper-crawling again. I idly checked out random, completely truthful crap for about ten minutes- it always takes her a while, as well as everyone else who does it- before going out to do the run. I noticed Billy squatting down in the tall grass and realized he was waiting for Sarah. I walked up to him and asked if he was bored.

"Yeah.. what's that about?"

"It's how it's done. I watched someone do it on fast forward before, and still got bored watching it. I'll do the second circuit in a few minutes when she gets in a good spot. She'll come back, but it'll take time." He sighed and for some reason I could imagine him saying 'But don't I have all the time in the world now?'.

I did the run again, not thinking so much this time. I'm glad so much of it is through the shady forest and not in the sun. I don't mind jumping over the rocks at all.

When I got back I saw an Enforcer finish applying force to a badly hurt peasant, the homiform causing lots of bruising and pain but careful not to damage actual muscles. Oh, fuck. Well, first I have to finish the run- I ran past the whole scene, with crying women and scared, angry men, to the finish line, and then walked back. Yes, you peasants, my running is more important than your lives.

"What happened?", I asked the Enforcer casually, ignoring the reactions around me of shock and horror. A few angry peasants turned to me with fists clenched and horrified looks on their faces. Yeah, right, guys. Try it, I dare ya.

"He tried to escape.", the Enforcer answered me, simply.

"Don't you understand that you're outmatched?", I asked the peasants rhetorically as the Enforcer translated. "You're not the only ones being tested here.", I truthfully said. "All you have to do is continue with this for the next five weeks and we'll let you go, full and maybe a bit richer for your trouble.", I lied. "By the way, in case you forgot, this is an island. There's nowhere to run." A couple of gasps at that. Stupid normals. "Now get back to work." I thought I'd have to exert more force, but they slowly, reluctantly did what I told them. I walked back inside, annoyed.

"Idiot peasants. One of them thought he could escape.", I complained to my two servants.

"What happened?", Billy asked.

"An Enforcer beat the shit out of him. They're still working, but they look at me like I'm Satan." Billy looked at me like I was Satan. I laughed. "So what's the answer?"

"They're not scanning.", Sarah said. "Well, now to order a fake head of hair for you.", she turned to Billy and said. Woah! Crap, how could I have missed that? But there was a flaw..

"Don't, Sarah.", I said. "No intentionally bringing anything except this jet or its current contents, remember?"

"Who were those rules given to?", she asked.

"Me. But you're my implanted servant, and commanding you to do something is.." She started smiling at 'commanding'. "That really is the exact wording, isn't it?" Exact wording means everything here. "That does make things interesting. All right, you can do it if you want." I also knew- but didn't say- that the Enforcers would have no way of knowing whether they were commanded or not.

"That reminds me- Billy, I forbid you to ever get your hair cut or otherwise have your body looking different from mine.", I told him, and he was unsurprised.

"Wait, wait.", Billy said to Sarah. "Sarah, what do you mean, just order it? Obviously, if you're going to get something to make me look exactly like him, they'll know you're cheating."

"How? They'd need to prove it.", she replied. They are required to err on the side of caution every time. "It's easy to claim that it scares the peasants more or something like that."

"You two are so damn confident.", Billy said, and Sarah and I laughed at him.

There's only one way to explain this. "Billy, welcome to the Illuminati." Sarah ordered the carefully-crafted wig.

Well.. not much else I can do, now. Better to just do the next run, relax, and save precious caloric energy. I walked up to my room and laid in bed, just thinking for a bit. Well, Howard, you'll be the Dominator soon, and the Illuminati will be yours. Gah. Saying 'The Illuminati will be mine!' is like saying 'This complicated maze of sewage pipes and tangled problems will be mine!' I won't know what it's like until I actually do it, but controlling world controllers is going to get annoying. Oh well. I won't mind. There's so much I've yet to learn, so much to experience, and as the ultimate authority on the planet, I will very literally be able to do it all.

After the run, some rest, another meal, and some more words with Billy, I just rested and screwed around until I fell asleep.

And was woken up by another loud, nightmarish scream.