I was woken up by Joey opening the door a crack with a sheepish look on his face. "Hey.. you in the bathroom.. ah, guess not. I was knocking.. and are both of you naked?" The covers were half off.

"It's soundproof.", Paul reminded him. "And we just sleep like that. If you don't want to see it, just turn around." Joey did, and Paul got dressed- I did the same. Sarah walked into the room silently, as usual- she wanted in on the conversation. "Hey, I was wondering.. what has Jeremy told you not to do?" Joey looked at him curiously. "Like, permanently, never do this or that, what commands like that?"

"Right now? None.", Joey said, turning back around slowly. Wait.. no standing orders..

"You mean he didn't tell you not to kill him?!", I asked in absolute amazement. Either Jeremy never got his hands on the little black book, or he ignored it entirely.

"No, he didn't.", Joey said, as if the question was irrelevant and/or stupid.

"So you're just going to let him..." I didn't want to finish the sentence, and Joey interrupted quickly enough so I wouldn't have to.

"Let him? Let him do what? Billy, are you crazy or something? He's my friend! If it wasn't for him, I'd be stuck in some halfass, fuckwit town in the middle of nowhere, reading schoolbooks and not knowing half what I know now, dealing with parents, annoyed to hell by bullies and idiots and all kinds of shitheads. It's not like he makes me do his chores and shit." Of course not. Enforcers do that. But how could Joey just... surrender himself when he can... I was at a total loss for words.

"Billy, let me handle this.", said Sarah, her professionalism in her voice. "Look, Joey, that kid might be your friend but he is a fucking Illuminatus! And let me tell you-"

"Sarah, Billy, can I talk to you guys for a second?" The inflection was Howard's, but the voice was Paul's. We turned our heads around and allowed him to gently grab our necks and pull us down for an impromptu huddle.

"Look at him, guys. He's happy. Do you mind doing him a fucking favor and leaving him that way?" I wanted to smack Paul across the face, make him realize- then Sarah nodded slowly, and I realized in a second what a fool I would be to smash Joey's illusions. They're probably the only thing keeping him from depression or outright insanity. He can kill that boy if he wants to. If he chooses not to, that's entirely his business. I'm not going to hurt friendly people just because they've got reality problems. Hell, this whole thing is a reality problem.

"Joey... I'm sorry for..", I said, realizing what my words could do to his mind.

"Billy. I understand. And it's okay. But it's not like you think it is, not between me and Jeremy. He's still my friend, it's not like he's going to.. you know."

"Believe me, we know."

"I could tell you all about the things that we've done together.. but I mean, come on. I know you guys have a lot better stuff than that to talk about." Yes, and particularly in Paul's case, a lot worse.

Sarah took a deep breath. "All right.. if we're going to start sharing stories, I'm going to say one of mine, and let's not volunteer any information to anyone else." Meaning Howard, certainly.

"Wow, Sarah, you're really going to start talking about something on your own?", Paul asked, mockingly. She smirked, a bit smug, as if she were the Queen of Silence (which she is) and everyone should respect when she chooses to break it.

"I was eight years old. This one Illuminatus had done something potentially damaging to secrecy- I don't remember the level or the crime or anything- but the thing was, he didn't ever want to come to any meetings or any event where it was just Illuminati. He knew what he was doing might be assassination-worthy, so he thought he could just avoid it by always having bodyguards and other people near him- he didn't have Enforcers, I remember that much- but there was no way anyone could get close to him or be certain to shoot him and get away. The way he did things, even snipers wouldn't have been possible. He was a 45-year-old guy who smoked cigars, so I walked in there to poison his drink and give him a heart attack.

"Now remember, this was about five years ago. The Enforcers I had weren't all that smart. This one could hold a conversation among drunk rich idiots okay, but not much else. It wouldn't have been able to follow me out secretly in the same way the guy left, so I went that way without it. There was no contingency plan, this was all being played by ear-transmitter. Here's the thing. It was late at night, and this was a fancy party this guy was having. I was wearing a poofy pink dress and heeled shoes it was almost impossible to walk silently in." I was expecting Joey, or more probably Paul, to guffaw at that, but neither of them did. "Obviously, I couldn't follow him directly. I had to have another guy following him and reporting on his movements." The way she spoke, I could tell it was an embarrassment. "I was looking around for other people, I had a bullshit story ready if anyone asked me where I was going. This one pedophile jackhole sees this helpless little girl walking past, takes it as an opportunity, jumps out of an alley, and tries to grab me." We all smiled- there's only one way this story can end. "They were painted pink, but I had the nails. His arms never even really got close. I slashed them vertically before he'd finished making his grab, and then I turned around, jumped up, and just tore open his throat. I was just so fucking pissed."

"So what happened?", Joey asked.

"What do you think happened? I was covered in blood. They had their van there and me in it in less than five seconds."

"And the guy..?"

"One of my guys recalculated the risk and took him out with a dart gun to the face. Same stuff I would have used to poison him. He had his heart attack after all." A brief pause. "That was the last time I ever wore a dress or any kind of shoes like that. I don't even have any in my closet."

"So you don't want us to tell Howard and give him any ideas."

"Actually, even if you tell him, he almost certainly won't." The emphasis on 'almost' was very slight, but enough for everyone to hear it.

"Also.. about him and you..", Joey said. "You had his son, Sarah. Right after a fight. And then you let him be shipped off without even worrying. You do care, I can tell. But there's just no emotional bond. You didn't mind him being taken at all."

"To Northberg.", Sarah said, as if that explained everything. In an important way, it did.

"But what about his emotional attachment to you?", Joey asked. She shook her head at him, as if his words held no value.

"For an engineered? Even if I am his mother," The words sounded alien from Sarah's mouth. "he won't care. He's one of the Northberg kids now, and when he gets to be seven or so, he'll be an Illuminatus. I don't know what he'll be doing, or what he's going to hold in those four hands of his, but that'll be up to him."

"Yeah. They have it all, don't they?" Yes, and in so many ways. We all nodded. "You guys ever read Milton's Paradise Lost?" None of us have. "There's a line in there where Lucifer says it's better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven," I've read that line somewhere else before. "but that's just sour grapes, because he knows damn well that Heaven is better than Hell. See guys, this is why I don't mind. I've gone from a questionable existence in sheepville to serving here. Paul, make no mistake,", he said, turning to him, "this is a lot better than anything you could possibly have had." He turned to us with a wry look. "You two just got hosed."

"Not so heavenly then, is it?", Sarah got him with.

Joey shook his head and smiled demurely. "No. But I mean, look around you. I know Christianity is bullshit, but so much of it just so fits. I thought you guys were homicidal maniacs, but you're not. You're avenging angels, sent by your Master to punish the sins of stupidity and personal greed. The Illuminati even has its own Revelations, the End of Secrecy. For what he can do, for what he can control, Howard might as well be God. You two, maybe you three, are smarter than I am, so you'll probably find a million things wrong with what I'm saying, but.. you guys want to fall. Don't fall. It'll just make things worse." There were a thousand comebacks I could have said- 'Spoken like a true servant', You just love being his bitch', 'Maybe one day you'll actually be told to do something you don't want to do', ad nauseum- but I said none of them. Because, as much as I hate to admit it, he has a valid point.

Paul just shrugged. "You tell a story, Joey."

"What?"

"C'mon, Sarah told hers, I don't have much to say, and Billy has even less unless you count the times he's beat up normals. You can just look up all our Illuminated stuff." The tests, for example, are a matter of public record.

"Oh.. all right, I will. It's not much of a story, but I guess it's worth telling anyway. All right, so I was eight, and I was living like a couple miles away from Jeremy. If there were sidewalks or a path or something and I was older, I could have probably just biked there. After school, Jeremy called me up- he did that a lot- and he asked if I wanted to come over. Of course, I did, but my dad was going 'He spends too much time with that boy', and my mom was like 'They're friends, you have to let Joey spend time with his friends'.. this went on for fifteen minutes. Fifteen minutes for a five minute drive. I just did homework while they yelled at each other." Paul and I laughed. "Anyway, my mom just comes out and says 'Is this how you really want to act in front of Becky?' That's my little sister. And my dad just says 'C'mon, I'll take you', and so we're driving there and he doesn't say anything. So we get there, he goes to McDonald's- he doesn't even ask if we want anything, he just goes. Jeremy's dad was at work, his mom leaves us alone, so we were up in his room. We thought we had hours, so he starts sitting at his desk, and he was halfway through his homework. I just massaged his neck the whole time." I almost asked why, but it was obvious- he's Joey's friend, so why wouldn't he do something like that for him? "Fifteen minutes, he's done, he flops down on the bed, and guess what I say. 'Know what, bud? I would give my motherfucking soul for more time like this and a fuckload less time with my dipshit family.' Yes, I actually said that." This would have been a solid case of 'be careful what you wish for' if Joey wasn't actually happy with the results. "And Jeremy says 'Yeah, Joey, I'd give your soul too!' Yes, he actually said that, too!" Joey started laughing and Paul and I joined him a bit, Sarah simply listening. "So we're together laying there, just talking for like five minutes, and then my dad comes marching up the stairs and says it's time to go home. I just fucking got there. So I get off the bed, he bursts into the room without knocking, he pretty much drags me out the door, and when we're leaving Jeremy's house he says, 'You're not queer for him, are you?' And I'm like 'No.', and he says 'You've been spending too much time with him, you should spend more time with me' or some shit.. and I just wanted to reach over, hit the emergency brake, and pulverize his face with the steering wheel.. I'm not gay. I'll be honest, I love Jeremy, but seriously, it's not like that."

"Joey, we know.", I said. "C'mon, you walked in on us. Two computers, one bed. Paul and I are like you and Jeremy." Joey realized, smiled, and nodded.

"See, this is one of the cool things about this place. I can talk to people who know what I'm talking about." Joey was interrupted by Jeremy opening the door (without knocking, just like Joey's dad- oh wait, knocking would do Jeremy no good on a soundproof door.) and saying, "Hey, Joey. You know that asshole dad of yours?" Coincidence happens.

"We were just talking about him!", Joey shouted. We all laughed, and I heard Howard crack up laughing as well from downstairs.

"Well, guess what, I'm only a fifth so I can't kill him," Sarah nodded at that. "so I added him to a list of people to inflict undirected fear and anxiety on. I can take him off if you really want but-"

"Take him off? Hell no!", Joey shouted. "Undirected fear and anxiety is exactly what that bastard deserves!" We all laughed some more and went to play games (six-player beat-em-ups with six actual players, three of whom are bioengineered, own all ass) and run around. Jeremy and Joey hadn't seen the beauty of Howard's island, and enjoyed exploring its reaches. There was even a small cave that I've never been in, and we had to wade in ankle-deep water to get inside, although there were lots of dry areas. It was nice. A great hang-out spot for when you don't want to be inside but the sun (or heavy rain- being in here with a storm outside would just be cool) is coming down too hard.

"I think I'm going to start relaxing here.", Sarah said.

"And avoid my commands, Sarah?", Howard asked, raising an eyebrow. In reply, she pointed to an intercom that looked like it was part of the rock walls. Nice. We fooled around in there for about fifteen minutes, Jeremy being silly enough to try to get into a splash fight with Howard (he dodges bullets, remember?) and giving up loudly when he got lots of salt water thrown into his mouth and nose. After that, we ran around on the island, doing various fun and imaginative things, until a few hours later when Jeremy and Joey had to go home, waving and smiling from Jeremy's helicopter as it whup-whup-whupped into the sky.